Iowa…the Belly of the Beast

Gosh.  If you’re like me, the phone is ringing twice an hour now with surveys, polls, and pre-recorded messages from this person and that person endorsing various candidates. 

It’s kind of neat to be in the epicenter of the political process right now.  Even more exciting is how vexing Iowans are to the mainstream media.  Old nags are coming from the back of the field with 6 foot tall jockeys riding them it seems and no one can peg who’s leading.  I saw a poll yesterday that put 3 candidates in a dead heat for the Caucuses in both parties.  It’s a 6 horse race if you believe them. 

Here’s the call to the line! (please read in your best horse racing voice…come on!)
Annnnnnd they’re off!

Elder Hero’s
jockey seems to have left the track because he wasn’t paid and Tennessee’s False Start never left the gate!  In turn 2…The Huckster comes from nowhere……now on the inside its Right Mitt…now Left Mitt.  He seems to be a bit unsure where he stands but man is he cute…….and around turn three it’s Just For Men… does his coat look glossy!… coming into the home stretch I Appointed a Felon is fading…….and fast….now side by side….Oprah’s Bud is battling Whitewater Windfall….or was that Osmotic Experience? Wait a minute…..there’s another horse lurking just outside the track.  He appears to be a stud and all of the mares are distracted. I think that’s the barn mate of Osmotic Experience…yes it’s Lying Under Oath. OK now he’s taken a Philly into the oval barn out of sight. Back to the track.  In the home stretch it’s Right Mitt…..Osmotic…Right Mitt Osmotic……and Right Mitt at the line by a nose. 

By the 3rd of January though, we’ll have an idea of what people really thought when they were left alone. 

Can anyone improve the technology of those auto-dialers thought that take 2-3 seconds of me saying "HELLLLLLOOOOOO" to kick in?

May your chads be danglin’



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